HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

WHAT IS TOO THIN?

If you look anything like this young lady....YOUR TOO THIN! Go get a Big Mac for god's sake. How can anyone look in the mirror and find this attractive. This is the other side of the spectrum from being obese. And I would wager just as detrimental to your body. The vitamin deficiencies and other negative aspects of malnutrition come to mind.

OK HAG, FACE IT, YOUR 50 NOT 20!

Yes I am guilty of being an old school Madonna fan. But not any more! Every dog has its day, and some certain people cannot come to grips with the reality that they are done. Let me share a few stories I heard from people who attended the recent Detroit concert. 1st and foremost. the bitch was late. Not just a few minutes TWO FUCKING HOURS! What disrespect to the fans. People who brought their kids, for whatever retarded reason, had to leave cause it was getting too late. The parking, which was $35.00 a piece was a cluster fuck. One way in and one way out. Holy fucking bottleneck Batman. As far as the show, she sang for 2 hours straight, no breaks. She sounded like stale ass on most of the songs. She topped it off with some good old Prince style FAKE guitar playing. Face it you washed up ghetto whore, you have seen your day. Go sit somewhere and try to remember when you were a good entertainer that actually had a smidge of respect for the people who made your career...YOUR FUCKING FANS YOU WORE OUT ASS MAGNET!

FOOD FOR THOUGHT!

Just a little reminder of the good old days. And to think, the $1997.00 was equal to about $5500.00 when this SUPER DEAL OF THE CENTURY was put out there.....Wow I feel old!

LIVING LARGE!

I have to wonder if they have to pay lot rent on this wonderful mansion? This 6 bedroom palace also seems to sport a greenhouse, perhaps they self medicate with whatever HERB they are growing in there. One can only imagine what the folks that own this little commune look like....

SOMETIMES PEOPLE JUST USE WORDS TO HEAR SOUNDS!

Well, let me start off by saying that this entry is all about my step son's dad. I have been around my step son for 9 years, he is a wonderful, brilliant, funny, energetic and articulate kid. For the most part he is a blast to be around and always has been. Well, his dad, I will refer to as TURD McDINGUS, used to be great too. We always got along and he was Johnny on the spot when it came to doing things with his son. Well ole TURD McDINGUS was introduced to the whole internet dating thing, by me. He utilized it as a tool to have "MUCH SEX" with many women. He started getting into swing parties, orgies and all kinds of kinky shit. Not that I condone that kind of behavior, but what he does on his time is his business, he never brought it around his son, so being a single guy, he is cool to do as he wants. Well one day, out of nowhere, we hear that he is having this HOUSE CARP and her NEEDY assed kid move into his house. He even went as far as to give his son's room to the needy kid and made his kid move his stuff. So here it is, the only sancuary for my step son, away from his demanding and mean step sister, and now it has been squashed. He is forced to play with the afore mentioned needy brat and entertain her and her sleep over friends so MOMMY can read, eat cheese, slim fast bars and laxatives in peace. This is the part I get pissed at, before House Carp arrived, my step son was picked up every friday and dropped off on sunday nights, like clockwork. Now all of a sudden since little Miss. Eating disorder has to refuse to grow up and wants to go to the bar and get wasted every weekend that she does not have needy McGreedy, my step son has to deal with every other weekend at dads. This idot thinks that my wife is jealous of him being married. He refuses to accept that his son is pissed at him, even though his son has flat out told him. He refuses to take anty responsability for his own actions and blames everyone else. My wife is now not letting him see my step son unless he can adhere to the original scheduale as it is not fair to alter a kids whole life because some HOUSE CARP is suddenly more important than him. I have been with Mom for 9 years and married 4 years. And he still even says to the friend of the court people that my wife is just jeleous of him being married. He is now a piece of shit in my book and will remain so until he grows the fuck up and realizes what he is doing to his son!

ONE COOL SITE...SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE!

I have been going to this site for years, and I always get a laugh out of it. They do have some adult material so make sure the kiddies are not around when your looking. They even reward people for sending their ideas for T-Shirts in. If they use your idea they reward you. I am not gonna waste my time telling you what my favorites are, you judge for yourself. I have added a link in the top left hand side of my blog. Or just click on the picture above. Have a look!

LETS PLAY A GAME. PUT A CAPTION TO THIS PICTURE.

Ok....from time to time I come across a picture that I cannot understand. Lest see who can make this picture make sense. Comment away and the winner will get their props!

BE A GOOD PARENT ON DEVIL'S NIGHT!

Well, here it is, another devil's night has fallen upon us. How many fires will there be in good old filthy Detroit tonight? It is a shame that part of our yearly activities are to find a nice high roof, outside of Detroit, and watch the sky light up with fires and destruction. There are actually good things that come of this. The houses that are abandoned and falling apart usually get burned. These houses are a haven for crack heads and Nair do wells. There are endless stories of Detroit's children being dragged into these houses by scumbags and sexually assaulted and sometimes even killed. Most of the houses getting burned are these empty desolate houses that the city of Detroit claims they do not have the money to tear them down. But there are also plenty of occupied homes being set of fire as well as endless gunshots and violence. Here is an idea, maybe if parents would be parents the mess would not be so bad. My parents never let me or my sibling out of the house on this particular evening. They know that we would have got into some kind of trouble or caused some kind of damage. So just do your job, be a parent and monitor your child's activities and maybe it would be a safer world out there tonight. I would wager that the amount of fires goes up drastically from last year due to the economy. Many insurance claims will be filed tomorrow morning as people set fire to their own empty rental properties and foreclosure homes. We will see.

What is the definition of beauty?

How does one measure beauty? You can deny it all day, but you know darn well that when you 1st set eyes upon someone, the judging begins. Are they a mess? Are they beautiful? Are they in the middle? You answer all of these questions immediately. Yes you can spit out that beauty is only skin deep and that the internal beauty is all that matters. But you know that is BS. For example, would you rather your son showed up with the above pictured HOT MESS as his new fiancee or Cameron Diaz? Before you start slamming me, be honest with your answer to yourself. The only way you could really find beauty in a person like the one pictured above would be if it was a relative of yours or a loved one.

THE ENDLESS VARIETY OF FETISHS

fet⋅ish

  /ˈfɛtɪʃ, ˈfitɪʃ/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [fet-ish, fee-tish] Show IPA Pronunciation
–noun

1.	an object regarded with awe as being the embodiment or habitation of a potent spirit or as having magical potency.

2.	any object, idea, etc., eliciting unquestioning reverence, respect, or devotion: to make a fetish of high grades.

3.	Psychology. any object or nongenital part of the body that causes a habitual erotic response or fixation.

Why do people develop fetishes? It may never be answered. But I have heard of some really weird fetishes. Anything from feet, balloons, latex, smoking, sneezing and so on....

Some fetishes are (in my opinion) gross, some are confusing and some are totally impossible for me to understand. For instance, there is one fetish that involves having a person stomp on a mans testicles. I have no idea how someone could like that. I have seen such videos and i causes me to cringe. I do not know a man that does not immediately shoot his hands down to protect his goody bag when viewing one of these. Than there is the infamous "Two girls and a cup" video that circulated several months ago. Someone somewhere finds it sexy but the average person will have a hard time keeping their hurl down if they view it.

Feel free to share your thoughts and maybe some of the strangest fetishes you are aware of. Also feel free to share what turns you on. Myself, I am a foot man. My wife has the sexiest feet in the world (along with many other of the sexiest body parts). Some people find feet repulsive. Others find them erotic. I wonder what makes their views so different?

BREAST FEEDING IN PUBLIC????

Why is it that women feel that it is necessary to breast feed in public? I understand that the squalling offspring need to eat, but come on. I was in a local mall yesterday with my 12 year old step-son and we walked up on one of these public feeding mommas. Of course he had question. He was like "WHAT THE!" I tried my best to explain what he just saw. All he kept saying, and most likely is still saying is "I saw boobies." I was not prepared to tackle the barrage of questions that followed. I tried my best to keep it technical, however, the dumbfounded glare in his eye and the constant repeating of the word boobies drove me slightly insane. Here is the thing, get a pump and bottle your succulent drippings or go into a rest room or at the very least, in your car and feed your screaming monkey. Not only do I have no desire to see your leathery nips, but I should not have to explain this to my kid.

CHECK OUT THIS ASSHOLE!

So, the day after I officially file a juicy chapter 13, I get this parasite sending me solicitations to invest through him. Ken Fisher Investments. 1st off, you need a minimum of $750,000.00 to invest with this idiot. 2nd I looked at my credit report and this asshole has ran my credit without my permission. What gives this maggot the right to just randomly run peoples credit? Is this legal? I assure you I am going to check on this and if he broke any Fair Credit Act laws, I will invest. I will invest in an attorney and get some shit started faster than you can flick a maggot off a wino!

OMAHA, Neb. - A Michigan mother drove roughly 12 hours to Omaha so she could abandon her 13-year-old son at a hospital under the state's unique safe-haven law, Nebraska officials said Monday.

The boy from the Detroit area is the second teenager from outside Nebraska and 18th child overall abandoned in the state since July when the law took effect.

There was no sign the boy was in immediate danger before he was abandoned and no indication why the boy's mother decided to leave him at the hospital, said Todd Landry, who heads the state's Department of Health and Human Services' division of children and family services.

Landry said at a news conference Monday afternoon that details of the boy's case still aren't known, such as whether the mother had sought help in Michigan first or whether the boy's father agreed to or aware of the decision.

Landry also said the boy doesn't appear to have any ties to Nebraska. He has been placed in an emergency shelter in the Omaha area.

Creighton hospital spokeswoman Lisa Stites said she did not know any additional details about the boy abandoned at her hospital Monday.

Last week, a 14-year-old girl from Iowa was abandoned at an Omaha hospital by her grandparents. The girl has since been returned to her family.

Officials with the Nebraska Department of Health and Human Services have stressed that the safe-haven law should be used for children in immediate danger only. Some officials are worried that Nebraska's broadly written law could make the state a dumping ground for unwanted children.

State officials have said parents and caregivers contemplating using the law need to understand there is no guarantee a child could be returned to them if they change their minds. The placement may involve the courts, and the process of regaining custody may prove difficult.

Officials have encouraged parents to seek other resources before resorting to abandonment. They've urged desperate parents to ask for help from family, faith-based groups and other community services before abandoning their children at hospitals.

Nebraska's law permits caregivers to abandon children at state-certified hospitals without fear of prosecution. It was intended to protect infants, as safe-haven laws do in most other states, but Nebraska's law specifies "child" without a definition. So some have concluded the law covers all minors, which in Nebraska includes anyone under the age of 19.

GET YOUR MITTS OFF MY DEED YOU GREEDY BASTARDS!

Well, we had to do it today. After much thought and a lot of struggling, it appears that the only way to keep our home is to file a nice little Chapter 13 bankruptcy. My wife, bless her soul, has been losing sleep and flinging files and paperwork all over the house for a few days now. She has had me printing documents, files and credit reports like it was no one's business. She set up an appointment with a local expert and away we went. I hope it all goes well for us. My wife and children deserve a home. This economy and our "SO CALLED" government provide so much more for foreigners and welfare recipients. Don't get me wrong, there are some great people who have to utilize the welfare system, but there are more lazy dirtbags sucking the system dry than you van shake a stick at. I have seen and met some of these winners over the years. EXAMPLE: Topless dancer making $300.00 a day and collecting food stamps and on medicaid. These are the system milking scum I am speaking about. Anyway, here we are, trying to make ends meet and live the American Dream. My wife puts it best, it is no longer the American dream, it is the American NIGHTMARE! It is hard to face these problems day to day, wondering if your children will have a place to call home the next day. Hopefully we can get a break with the Chapter 13. I will keep you all posted and please pray for us.

Who holds your hair?

Sounds like a stupid question doesn't it? Well if you think about it, it is not so stupid. Women will get it more than men, but please allow me to elaborate on the intense true meaning of this question. It is commonly know amongst women that a true BFF (Best Friend Forever) will not think twice about holding your hair in the event of sickness or a drunken stupor. It matter not what the evil cause of the spewage is, but more, the fact that their is spewage at all. A true friend will be there, no questions asked, just be there to do whatever they are able to do to assist you in anything that life tosses your way. Look at who you surround yourself with, who's hair would you hold? Who do you truly think would hold yours? This question posses a few problems for me, as I look around I realize that everyone (other than my wonderful wife) is too busy holding their own hair to even realize that mine needs holding. Life can be unfair and lonely sometimes. I know that there are several people who's hair I would proudly hold. And I will not change that in myself. I will only realize that I am a better friend than they are and continue to be who I am. I will not change and be resentful, because you never know when your going to need or have your hair held. You also may be surprised when you glance back to see who it is holding it. Just a thought.

Why is it that women use sex as a weapon?

Where is the hidden book? These rules, policies and procedures that all women adhere too. I know somewhere there is a secret society that meets on a regular basis to discuss how they can torture their men. They sachet around the house, looking all kinds of sexy. Then when you say anything about how they look or try to make a move BLAM "IS THAT ALL YOU EVER THINK ABOUT?" When they want some action, it is readily available to them. But us men, we can never say no, due to the fact that we never know when the next charity event will occur. When you first hook up with a woman, WOW you sure do get it as much as you want and more. Passion is plentiful for some steamy action. Anytime, anywhere and any way you want it. Even a few little kinky freaky extras added in there to make you SURE that this is the woman for you. You feel comfortable in taking that plunge into wedlock knowing that you will never have the need to play the game any further. Then as years go on, and infatuation fades, so does your sex life. I can see not feeling like it as often or having some aches and pains from time to time that come with age and time. But come on ladies, once every other month to once bi-annually. There was even a time that holidays and anniversaries were days of glory for us men. Knowing that you could almost guarantee a little action for the day. Well, that goes away as well. If you know how to break this cycle and get things back to even a slight hint of normal, PLEASE tell me in the comment section. I will check it daily for some help.

Cool Site!

Sometimes we just need a little madness!

Bhagat: had his twin brother on his stomach

Sanju Bhagat's stomach was once so swollen he looked nine months pregnant and could barely breathe. iving in the city of Nagpur, India, Bhagat said he'd felt self-conscious his whole life about his big belly. But one night in June 1999, his problem erupted into something much larger than cosmetic worry. Mehta said that he can usually spot a tumor just after he begins an operation. But while operating on Bhagat, Mehta saw something he had never encountered. As he cut deeper into Bhagat's stomach, gallons of fluid spilled out — and then something extraordinary happened. "First, one limb came out, then another limb came out. Then some part of genitalia, then some part of hair, some limbs, jaws, limbs, hair." At first glance, it may look as if Bhagat had given birth. Actually, Mehta had removed the mutated body of Bhagat's twin brother from his stomach. Bhagat, they discovered, had one of the world's most bizarre medical conditions — fetus in fetu. It is an extremely rare abnormality that occurs when a fetus gets trapped inside its twin. The trapped fetus can survive as a parasite even past birth by forming an umbilical cordlike structure that leaches its twin's blood supply until it grows so large that it starts to harm the host, at which point doctors usually intervene.

Why do people pretend to listen and care?

I just want to understand, that is all. When money was good around here, and a friend hit hard times, we were the first ones to reach out a helping hand. Everything from tossing them some cash to letting people move in with us so they would not be on the streets. Now we have hit hard times and have a crap load of issues and not one person even cares to listen to me or my wife talk about them. People still, to this day, call with their little trivial problems and put a deaf ear to ours. Now do not get me wrong, I am not so self centered that I think anyone owes us anything. I just do not understand why every one, including strangers, want to call us when they hit a bump. They dump all of their problems on our lap. OK, I want to make this clear. We have enough things to deal with of our own, we are all stocked up on problems. So take your " I have an ingrown toenail" and " My lover won't divorce his wife for me " and " I spent all of my money on weed and do not have money for gas" problems and stick them. We have real problems. Business is at a stand still, I cannot find a decent job and we are not even living paycheck to paycheck, as we do not know when we will get a paycheck. These are real problems that are a result partially of my stubborness and partly from the failing economy. We just want to keep a roof over our heads and food on the table. We are very loving people and I do not want people to think they cannot turn to us when they need help or advice, but be decent enough to lend an open ear and see what is going on in our world as well. At least pretend you care for one minute. I tell my wife all the time that it is US against the WORLD. No one else cares or is willing to put forth any effort to help out where they can. I guess I am just venting, but it feels good to write it, even if no one reads it.

Get to blogging!

Well, I have not got the slightest idea what to blog about, so I will start with an introduction. I am a licensed Private Investigator in the FAILING state of Michigan. 5 Years ago, I had to hire people to help me keep up with the workload. Today I am looking for a job due to the fact that no one has the money to spend. It seems that lately people just do not care if their spouse is cheating, as long as they are working. I have been blessed with a wonderful family and I want to take care of them as best as I can. I have a great wife (whom is a PI as well), a beautiful 4 year old daughter and a great 12 year old step-son. I also have a 120 pound half Lab half Rott dog named Big Head and the prettiest female muted Calico Main Coon cat you have ever seen. My favorite vehicle is a Jeep Wrangler. My favorite food is anything that has not been infected with Ecoli. I do not like to read but have almost a photographic memory. I play guitar. I do not drink or do drugs. I smoke too much and have a really warped perverted sense of humor. I promise that this Blog will get a lot more exciting with polls, weird pictures, stupid news stories and stupider jokes. So, stay tuned and let's see what happens!